Chapter 5 Loss of hair

   Losing your hair as many do with cancer treatments, is a very strange sensation.  You get little clues.  One morning a clump of hair comes out as you brush; a number of strains appear on your pillow; the drain in your shower is clogged with hair.  You ignore these clues as long as you can.  The bald spot on the back of your head becomes more and more visible and spreads.  You have to brush hairs off your coat after every wearing and sweaters seem like hair magnets.  You are definitely shedding, more and more profusely.  It's going--going--GONE!  At least that was my experience.

   Others react differently.  Some take an in-your-face attitude and defiantly have their head shaved at the first indication of hair loss.  Jill had a "Shave My Head Bald" party.  She called her friends and invited them to attend, wearing a hat to leave for her at the end of the party.  With a sheet covering the floor she shaved her head as her friends stood around her, sang and cheered her on.

   Wigs, turbans, scarves are solutions for some.  Florenece, on her blog Perks with Cancer, posted four pictures of herself with different wigs and asked viewers to vote on which they liked best.  Wigs are a great way to express some hidden part of your personality.  Do you want to try being a sultry brunette, a glamorous blond, a perky redhead?  Go for it!

   Some take a light hearted approach.  Shelva said her grandchildren called her the Great Bald Eagle.  She would pop her wig off and on to surprise people.

   Record in your journal what the experience was like for you, or share it here.

   Then reflect on these questions: What does your hair mean to you?  Hair is often associated with beauty in women, but where does beauty really come from? As I reflected on this question, suddenly "hair" news was everywhere.  I was watching an episode of "The Incredible Race" on TV.  One contestant refused the assignment to shave her head.  In tears, she took a penalty rather than comply.  Just yesterday an item was on the news about a 13 year old girl who was in Court for cutting off the long hair of a little 3 year old girl she did not even know.

   Some see hair as a Power Statement.  In the Bible we read how Samson's hair was his strength.  When I was just beginning to recover my hair and had a short fuzz covering my head, an acquaintance, who did not know I had had cancer, walked up to me on the street and said, "I want to tell you how much a appreciate your "Strong Woman" haircut.  She seemed disappointed when I told her it was not a "Strong Woman" haircut but a "Weak Woman" desperation.  Loss of hair reminds us of how little power and control we have.

   Loss of hair definitely makes a statement.  Think of Skinheads and Monks and Cancer Survivors.  All very different but each an example of profound transformation.

   What does Hair symbolize for you--a symbol of beauty--a power statement--a profound transformation?  How are you handling this situation?  your ideas may help others.